I was nearly sick yesterday. And it was all the fault of that author bloke, Keith Charters. Okay, so I blame him for most things, but this time it was definitely his fault.
He took me to Hawick, a town in the Scottish Borders. We were there as part of the Heart of Hawick Book Festival. The festival was great fun, with 400+ young people like me having a laugh at the 'funny but very slightly disgusting part' they voted for Keith to read out. There were some great questions too. They're an intelligent bunch in Hawick. And then there was the lunch afterwards...
Wow! The food was amazing. Keith made me test all of it, including the chocolate brownie and carrot cake with lots of cream on it. I said, 'No, Keith, you know I don't like cake, it's the last thing I would choose to eat. I'd rather eat my shoes than eat cake.' However, when I looked at my feet I saw I had on my good shoes, the ones with the hard soles. Eating those wouldn't have been good for my teeth. So I ate the cake instead. But only, I remind you, because Keith made me.
Anwyay, it wasn't the cake that Keith made me eat that made me sick. Not at all. It was getting there and back (to Hawick, I mean, not getting to the food and back...that didn't take me long!) Keith didn't go the way with the straight roads, he took the most twisty road on planet Earth. It was more twisty than twisting speghetti worms around a twisted fork whilst sitting on a Twister funfair ride. I could feel all that cake he'd made me eat sliding around in my stomach and thought I was going to give it the big heave-ho. But then, just as I thought I was going to see the cake Keith made me eat all over again, we rounded yet another corner and saw this:
'Stop the rocket,' I said, because we weren't driving we were flying (which you'd think would make it less twisty, but for some reason it didn't work that way). What, you don't believe that I was fying in my Lee on the Dark Side of the Moon rocket? I didn't think you would, so I took this photo to prove it:
And the good news is that the scenery was so amazing that I completely forgot about being sick because of all the cake Keith made me eat. Indeed it was so brilliant that I've persuaded Keith (who made me eat all those cakes...have I mentioned that before?) to go back sometime soon, perhaps with his family. (Okay, it's partly because there's a cafe at the spot where we landed the rocket...and they probably sell cake.) I can't wait.